bashed in mind

i'm realizing that i have become too isolated, overly sensitized

a little ignorance is jaw-dropping, just a tiny bit of hatred, devastating

do they really think a string of colored lights is gonna rescue me?

so over flat tires

Add them all up and then subtract

What a lousy earth! He wondered how many people were destitute that same night even in his own prosperous country, how many homes were shanties, how many husbands were drunk and wives socked, and how many children were bullied, abused or abandoned. How many families hungered for food they could not afford to buy? How many hearts were broken? How many suicides would take place that same night, how many people would go insane? How many cockroaches and landlords would triumph? How many winner were losers, successes failures, rich men poor men? How many wise guys were stupid? How many happy endings were unhappy endings? How many honest men were liars, brave men cowards, loyal men traitors, how many sainted men were corrupt, how many people in positions of trust had sold their souls to blackguards for petty cash, how many had never had souls? How many straight-and-narrow paths were crooked paths? How many best families were worst families and how many good people were bad people? (Joseph Heller, Catch-22)

superconnected

laughing and tearing up over eggs and toast, it's kind of my thing

also i've decided to be someone who "reads" at least for a while

a stranger to the sun's brutal gaze

i am becoming either old or a hypochondriac very quickly

little surprises around every corner, but nothing dangerous

the next thing on my calendar is labor day.

count on me, count on me

it's like the last couple of days of high school around here lately—much easier to be a good person when you don't have to do it for very long.

competition and forgotten ricotta

all homemade (white, arugula) pizzas, hours in the park, drunken phone conversations, and long bike rides considered, a pretty good, if a little lonely, weekend.

Parallel lines move too fast

i am catching myself accidentally holding my breath for long periods of time for no reason.

whether this is figurative or literal is left as an exercise for the reader.

For once a Destroyer quote here would be totally appropriate

well, i didn't get an autographed set list to top k's, but the show was amazing... a veritable wall of literary and pop culture references and static and guitars and who said dan bejar doesn't do banter?

later: an almost too-nice couple buying a homeless man dinner and a "corona to go" (!) from pancho v's. which somehow really seemed like it wasn't in any way out of guilt or for self-satisfaction or even pity but more like they were buying a friend dinner because they liked that friend so much... doing something like this may have just surpassed "write something a thousand people will read or use" on my list of goals in life.

Sometimes our bodies will get tired

i should get up at 4:30am central every day

stuck outside of san antonio with the memphis blues again

now that i live alone, staying in a hotel is an awful lot like being at home.

at best he ignores me

drunk on cheap australian red wine and listening to fiery furnaces on fancy headphones

if i've put myself in a position to be alone on saturday night, at least i've done it in style

did I strike the right set of chords? you're annoyed

i spent some considerable amount of this weekend trying to decide whether, if space and time were infinitely divisible, fully complex universes could form, evolve, and be destroyed in one cycle of a vibrating guitar string.

i made up a hand wavey explanation that they could not basically because the speed of light is absolute so that i could sleep*. and now the most interesting question i have is whether you can cook rice in a thermos.

*Roger says Heidegger handles the problem more elegantly by saying "Who cares?"

acting 25

taxes, serial numbers, health insurance, dreams about work, constantly a little bit sick, and sleeping in until 9am on the weekends

a dream narrated

and then every sound that had ever woken kevin up happened at once

i'm going to toss my porcupine any minute now

i accidentally conducted a psychological experiment on the plane from phoenix to san francisco last night.

starting at my pop physics book about string theory, to sudoku, to travel magazine articles,

to successively easier word puzzles,

my ability to process information and recognize patterns was, i would guess, 12% normal

i'm kind of fascinated that i could be that stressed/exhausted and yet unable to sleep.

can i just say, i'm happy to be home, and the best part is coming an hour and a half from now!

not one of my best days

though honestly i've been planning on wasting this half weekend for about a month

and i'm just sick enough to have pulled it off

don't look too close or you'll see the transistors

if it's true that at our most basic level we're made up of tiny vibrating strings of energy

is there really any better argument that the universe as we know it is running on someone's computer somewhere?

you shouldn't hurt the ones you love... unless you really want to

that i let non-essential friendships die is, i think, the worst thing about me

and the best is peanut butter and banana sandwiches. at least today

cycling trivialities

tonight i set the toaster on fire...

again

sunrise or a sunset

i am almost ashamed by how much i want to work from home with a puppy dog and a backyard

a four hour delay becomes something else entirely

i am on an unfamiliar streak of being unexcited to come home

without cheese or central heat, there is not a lot going on here

arguing semantics

because when it comes right down to it, what else is there to argue?

the first building block of civilization

hand mostly healed, hot water restored, cough and fever receding, i am happy

after four months in the pocket of my raincoat

we developed our own economy, waiting out the rain: beer for fire and conversation for wine

mark goodwin was pretty sure he had life figured out, and i cannot think of a convincing counterargument

i got a broken face

ah ah ah ah ah ooooh

apparently this is why my hand wasn't getting better very quickly